Miss Elliotsdottir

oh the irony..

2011-09-14T04:00:00.001+02:00

sometimes people come in, and surprise you when less expect it, sometimes you realize youve been sleeping way too long...

confusing times..once again.

la vie agridolç

2011-08-27T05:03:00.000+02:00

im feeling creative again, yet very very very confused.
only one way to take all of this out.
ink on canvas.

2011-03-11T21:32:00.001+01:00

2011-02-27T00:54:00.000+01:00

the big 29 arrives.
ladies and gentleman my ass aint old, but I sure feel like
Im not 20 no more.

if i had a house..in the caribbean...jejjejejeje

2011-02-03T09:51:00.003+01:00

im freezing my ass off..
and the only thought that i cant think off..
is..
if i had a house ( hehehehehehe) in the caribbean we would lay in front of it...in the summer time ( europeans have no idea of the aribbean summer) yet we would lay there...
its so cold i could bite my brain off i would not notice...
hence
this song..

..................................................................................................

2010-11-24T06:52:00.004+01:00

A couple of new pics, of Me::
a.) with 2 pounds of make up, and perra face, picture sent to Gabriele when he was away.
b.)Silly photoshoped Gabriele and Simon half awake, and loovely nail polish.
c.) Me with vintage fur coat ( gift from Gabriele :D ) trying to be sexy ie my mouth is open, ( not really achieving it).

hi again..

2010-11-24T06:28:00.003+01:00

As usual its been long.
punto.
Me siento frustrada, como si derepente este lugar no es mi lugar.
lo de siempre, shitty job, no mucha claidad de vida, y me siento presa..
presa de algo que quise por tanto tiempo, y presa del papeleo burocratico.
Is Barcelona over for me too?
Anyhow...
Hoy fui al world photo press..
y me dieron muchas ganas de llorar, pero este año estuvo como pobre el asunto, las imagenes estaban pequeñas..y una balsa de gringos gritanto.
Me entere de unn festival hoy!
y pretendo ir a ver este grupo el viernes.
Playboy bend!
lo se, no he escrito nada de relevancia, pero si me empujo a my old habbits, of writting maybe things will get better..
not outside, but here, were its important, inside.
Now, lets pray i can go to sleep.
6.33am, y tengo insomnio.
bueno no, theres a bit more..
Hoy, Gabriele y yo, cumplimos un año y cinco meses.
:)
who would have thought???
ok now im off to sleep, maybe more tomorrow.

Rita Pavone - Che m'importa del Mondo :: mi canción con Gabriele :)

2010-10-20T01:56:00.001+02:00

http://dl.dropbox.com/u/4559463/01%20Que%20me%20importa%20el%20mundo.mp3
(en castellano)

x-mas gifts thank you all for paying attention.

2010-10-18T21:32:00.004+02:00

1.)Guess Spectrum Men's Gold-Plated Watch
2.) Double Finger Centered Ring from
http://doesnotequal.myshopify.com/collections/all
3.)a week in madrid with my future husband. :)
thank you santa...

Loosing weight regime!

2010-10-18T20:32:00.006+02:00

so,
1ro) Master Cleanse for 3 days
2do) for cravings :: Green apple (36 calories), Zanahoria (30 calories) , Pepino, mitad ( 23 calories) kiwi (46 calories)
3ro) ensaladas, con fruta y espicanas,
4to) http://thecaloriecounter.com/ ( esta pagina me ayuda un monton)
5to) agua, agua, agua, agua, te, jugo de toronja, agua agua agua
6to) pilates y yoga! 4 dias por semana uno de los dos.
7mo) goal 90 minutos de cardio, pero hasta ahora el max. tiempo ha sido 60 min.

:) that's it.
good luck.

2010-10-09T12:12:00.001+02:00

I, yes I, forgot how to be alone.
Gabriele is in Italy and It feels like ages.

oh andy! by simon.

2010-10-01T15:59:00.002+02:00

zingara.

2010-09-02T05:34:00.004+02:00

Prendi questa mano,
zingara,
dimmi pure che destino avrò
parla del mio amore,
io non ho paura
perché
lo so
che ormai
non m'appartiene.

Guarda nei miei occhi,
zingara
vedi l'oro dei capelli suoi.
Dimmi se ricambia
parte del mio amore,
devi dirlo
questo
tocca a te.

Ma se e' scritto che
lo perderò,
come neve al sole
si scioglierà
un amore.

Prendi questa mano,
zingara

(strumentale)

Ma se e' scritto che
lo perderò,
come neve al sole
si scioglierà
un amore.

Prendi questa mano,
zingara,
leggi pure che destino avrò
Dimmi che mi ama,
dammi la speranza,
solo questo
conta
ormai per me.

family? anyone?

2010-08-26T01:37:00.002+02:00

Ultimamente, people have been hitting a soft spot.
The mighty powerful, concept of Family.
Let´s get a couple of things straight...
first of all.. Ive been seeking for one, since the age of 9, when i realized, that I didnt have one.
Hence, me wanting to travel the world at an early age, Hence the way that Ive always been in long ass relationships, because Ive been searching ( and i dont have to search no more ) for una especie de estabilidad que nunca tuve, no lo digo ni con pique, ni ira ni rabia, pero que nadie se confunda, cuando yo andaba con una pijama de mi madre, y un peluche que me habia regalado mi padre en representacion, cuando hice el performance de altos de chavon, el tema, era ese, me cocia cosas que representaban a mis padres, o seres ¨cercanos¨y cuando intentaba pararme de donde esta sentada se me caian y se rompian.
entonces, creo que quizas no he sido clara, pero para mi siempre lo he sido, Ive always been a loner, Ive never been alone or unatended, but I missed my parents growing up. i did.
and it is what it is, but people need to drop the bullshit, y el papel de NOW i can be a parent, i mean thats great, lovely, but someone just dont have a right, or quite honest i just dont respect certain actitudes, como si derepente gritas y exigir fuera la epifania de ser padre/madre.
Lop unico que puedo decir al respecto,es, respeten mis opiniones que son validas, quieranme por lo que soy, y no vean tanto la paja en el ojo ageno, aveces uno tiene un pedazo de estaca saliendo y no se da cuenta.
done. dont fuck with me, i know what family is. and i have one now.

Miss Noriko is back in my life.

2010-08-19T01:43:00.000+02:00

how to play your record from how to on Vimeo.

After loosing track of her, one of my fav, japanese women, emerge, with this lovely video. i missed her, and her incoherent ranting, that i cant really understand but feel so deeply. welcome back welcome back into my life :)

jiji.

2010-08-14T23:22:00.002+02:00

we thought we took a pic, but we didnt we made a video.jiji

geeking around.

2010-08-09T17:42:00.001+02:00

LADIES and Gents, we have a new imac in our hands!!!!!!

2010-08-07T12:06:00.002+02:00

Waiting for fall with arms wide open.

2010-08-04T17:07:00.006+02:00

Finally the main computer of the house, my sweet, silent, and cold agridolç has passed away in the city of after Barcolona, after 5 years of hard work, service and lealtad, she has gone to mac heaven ( yes im a geek) ,Gabriele and Simon helped the cause, but it was a G5.

Today we finally bought the new one, I updated my blog, woke up a 10am, went to the doctor, and had coffe.

ok, im ranting. i shall be back with the new geaaar.

please check

www.vainitaselliotsdottir.blogspot.com

brand nu shit. :D

how to learn english being 8 years old :: shy and antisocial::

2010-07-18T05:10:00.003+02:00

kinda back to the blogger world.

2010-07-17T22:57:00.005+02:00

It´s been way too long since i said anything.
and my last post have been a bit negative..jiji
It´s been a year with Gabriele, Ive gained 13 kilos, im working a bit more, we have our own little house, Simon finally has a father figure,its hot as fuck, im still messy, and Barcelona has been washing off my bones latetly...
I mean, i feel that i have what i came here to look for, if it makes sence, Im deeply in love, and for the first time i kinda understand what trust and a love love is...
I have to go, i just wanted to get back in the rutine, I have an interview with the folks at miniguide, IM SO exited.
i wont talk much i dont want to jinks it.
a picture, to show my fullness.

I could be wrong, yet this is what i think..

2010-06-04T03:48:00.003+02:00

1.-) Tired of being illegal.
2.-) Tired of the fact that everyone is allowed to slip because they were drunk, or they didnt remember yet somehow that rule does not applies to me.
3.-) Tired of Barcelona.
4.-) Tired of my lack of confidence and willpower.
5.-) Tired of my incapacity of keeping order.
6.-) Tired of earning two cents.
7.-) Tired of not drawing.

yes, I once again, came back to write, bitter, and a mad, but not really mad, just negative.

8:54 am I have to pee but my room smells like tobaco hence I cant really go out now.

2009-12-15T08:41:00.003+01:00

A couple of things i need to get of my chest....
If you'all don't know the lyric's to a song, shut up, listen and try to learn or understand at least the language.
( that goes to spanish peeps that kill songs with their sucky ass interpretations of english lyrics)
That said we can move on to...
si hace el maso que no escribo, but hey, i think start most of my posts like this..
What can I say..
many things and thong at the same time..
A lot of good things han pasado...like being MAD in love :D
rediscovering I can actually be 12 again and dig it, not in the full sense but...you know butterflies in your tummy, feeling like you walk on clouds, knowing that for any outside being of the bubble is most likely repulsive but not really paying attention to the outside noise.

Im fat but very pretty..

2009-11-09T13:14:00.001+01:00

If they follow you, dont look back, like Dylan in the movies...

ti voglio bene!

2009-10-25T17:31:00.002+01:00

4 months with gabs.
its been a learning process
grazie.

SEINFELD!

2009-10-21T02:00:00.001+02:00

Watch live video from wuzzap on Justin.tv
Watch live video from whoz_da_man on Justin.tv

Mi bebo y yo :D

2009-10-07T01:05:00.002+02:00

email que me mando my step mom realmente...ALALMANTE! :-/

2009-10-07T00:59:00.002+02:00

VAMO españa, eso e' progreso..vamo vamo cierrence ma, vamo vamo. con ese cerebrazo sobre lo hombro vamo vamo.
( fucking dick-heads)

Subject: Las ONG denuncian el acoso al inmigrante

Las ONG denuncian el acoso al inmigrante

El Congreso debate hoy la reforma de la Ley de Extranjería. Los colectivos de ayuda critican que criminaliza al sin papeles y lo convierte en mercancia.

El proyecto de Ley de Extranjería (LOEX) que hoy se debate en el Congreso de los Diputados "cosifica al ciudadano extranjero no comunitario y lo asimila a una mera herramienta de trabajo". Es la denuncia que hicieron pública ayer las principales entidades sociales que trabajan con los inmigrantes, CEAR (Comisión Española de Ayuda al Refugiado), Cáritas y la Red Acoge, en un comunicado conjunto. El texto ha sido asumido también por USO y la Coordinadora de ONG para el Desarrollo.
La nueva Ley de Extranjería (la cuarta modificación que sufrirá el texto en nueve años) aumenta las restricciones para alcanzar "una inmigración más ordenada", según han manifestado en reiteradas ocasiones los ministros del Interior, Alfredo Pérez Rubalcaba, y Trabajo e Inmigración, Celestino Corbacho.
CEAR, Cáritas y Red Acoge relacionan las restricciones con la crisis económica
El discurso vincula el proceso migratorio a la posesión de un contrato de trabajo. Las ONG y asociaciones de inmigrantes denuncian que la nueva ley restringe también las libertades y derechos de los extracomunitarios.
Los apartados más polémicos son cuatro. El principal y que más críticas ha levantado es el aumento de 40 a 60 días de los encierros en los Centros de Internamiento para Extranjeros (CIE). Los otros tres están relacionados con los derechos y las sanciones: sólo se podrá reagrupar a los cónyuges, hijos y ascendientes mayores de 65 años; los sin papeles víctimas de violencia de género serán expulsados si no se demuestran los malos tratos; y se multará con hasta 10.000 euros favorecer la estancia de un inmigrante en situación irregular.
"Hay una obsesión por el control y por la seguridad", subrayó Alfredo Abad, secretario general de CEAR, quien añadió que "algunos aspectos del proyecto de Ley son claramente inconstitucionales".
Las asociaciones tachan la reforma prevista de «inconstitucional»
Para Cáritas, CEAR y Acoge, el proyecto de reforma supone "un retroceso legal en toda regla" y aportan cuatro motivos "fundamentales".
Las organizaciones aseguran que la política de inmigración se regula "respondiendo a la crisis", se cambia la normativa "a la baja" en cuanto a garantía de derechos y refuerza "la percepción del inmigrante como mercancía". A su juicio, estos factores dificultan la integración y alimentan una percepción que estigmatiza al inmigrante, en especial al que está en situación administrativa irregular.
Respecto al endurecimiento de los internamientos y las sanciones, las organizaciones recuerdan: "No existe delito alguno, ni el migrante es un delincuente". No obstante, admiten que la reforma es necesaria, pero para que sea "entendida como una oportunidad" para construir "una mejor sociedad de acogida" y potenciar los valores de "la diversidad, la solidaridad, la participación y la integración".
El Gobierno cuenta con el apoyo de CiU y CC para rechazar las enmiendas
Después de un lento proceso de negociación, el Gobierno sacará adelante la ley, presumiblemente, con los votos a favor de Convergència i Unió (CiU) y Coalición Canaria (CC).
El portavoz de Inmigración en el Congreso de los Diputados, Carles Campuzano, se reunió ayer con el ministro Corbacho para "ultimar detalles" antes de la votación de hoy. Aunque las negociaciones no comenzarán oficialmente hasta después del debate, el líder catalán aseguró que encontró al Gobierno "muy abierto" a sus propuestas.
Las reivindicaciones de CiU cuyos 10 votos resultan claves para la aprobación pasan por que las comunidades autónomas tengan más participación en los procesos vinculados a la reagrupación familiar, el arraigo y la contratación en origen. Además, el grupo quiere potenciar las segundas lenguas como elemento de integración.
Convergència i Unió reivindica que se potencien las segundas lenguas
Las opciones de que el grupo socialista encuentre apoyos en el resto de grandes grupos parlamentarios es muy reducida: PP, ERC-IU-ICV y PNV presentaron a principio de verano tres enmiendas a la totalidad de la ley.
Cáritas, CEAR y Acoge tampoco consideran oportuno el momento de crisis económica en el que se ha realizado la reforma. El documento que hicieron público ayer (que ha sido presentado a todos los grupos parlamentarios, aunque ni PP ni IU han recibido todavía a las entidades sociales) alerta del riesgo de que se realicen "lecturas inadecuadas" de la crisis económica. Así, temen que se puedan "vincular, de manera simplista y peligrosa, crisis e inmigración".
Las sentencias del Tribunal Constitucional y la adaptación a la normativa europea son dos de los argumentos principales que se han presentado para justificar la reforma. "En ellos, no encontramos explicación para el recorte de derechos que se ha introducido", reivindican las ONG.
Pese a todo, valoran que el nuevo texto reconozca los derechos de asociación, reunión, sindicación y huelga a los extranjeros en situación irregular. Aunque a la vez temen que se aproveche la ocasión para recortar otros derechos. Los más vulnerables son el acceso al empadronamiento, el derecho a la educación, el acceso a la vivienda y a los servicios sociales y sanitarios básicos, el acceso al derecho a justicia gratuita o la reagrupación familiar.
"La reforma nos afecta a todos, ya que pone en riesgo el futuro de inclusión que perseguimos, limita seriamente los derechos fundamentales de los migrantes y supone un retroceso en la construcción de un verdadero espacio de libertad, justicia y convivencia", objetaron los responsables de estas entidades. El comunicado concluye respecto a la actual redacción de la norma: "Perdemos todos: nuestra sociedad retrocede y también los derechos de los inmigrantes".

So, im chubby, de vez en cuando se me sale un moco cuando me rio compulsivamente and today I...

2009-10-06T23:04:00.003+02:00

i fucking farted.
dude.
que verguenza.
legal, i farted asi infront of Gabriele.
el me abrazo and my reaction was to fart.
wtf?
Ke maldita verguenza.

pero na, un mambo newyolkino pa reirme de mis esfinteres.

duh the song !

2009-10-04T12:43:00.000+02:00

runniinggg with my rain face hommmeeeee

I'm not living... I'm just killing time.

2009-10-04T10:21:00.012+02:00

SO yes, back into introspective mode.I realized today my music is sad, it had anger, but sad emo shit indie shit, not anger like, oh I'm going to kill you and I'm so angry ill kill myself, rather is more like, I'm so sad ill dry myself crying oceans and ill become soil because this pain is crushing, I mean I had a clue, but I’m trying to observe the things around me, that bring me down, since I’ve started seeing in other people, music, clothing, basically regular daily choices....

That brought me, to a song, a song I cried to, so many times, and In those days I felt that the soft chavon breeze was sandpaper to my skin...Indeed the song is pretty, I don’t feel it like that anymore (now I have a new set of songs that do that) ...going deeper, I heard this song, after the Todd aftermath, and now that I look back, how many years hmm, 6 years ago...

That is the break up that left me, dead. I've had many break ups, but that one, was marked by this song...and honestly, I don't know if it was maybe the first real heart demolition, but I really really thought I was going to die, It became physical, It was so harsh that getting up from my bed was an effort, or eating, I couldn't eat ( and God knows how I love to eat), I’m impressed thought because It was obvious He did not see who I was, He did not see beauty in me, bueno it was not clear to me either, but now, looking back, me quejo y todo, pero I’m so glad ssooo glad, I've never felt again pain like that, And I really don’t know what I saw in him, ( y no digo por bajar sus cosas enserio) but we were so different, I could understand some of his things, or intereses but not all, yet there I was, thinking life was over, bueno I was young, very, and I had never had that encounter with anyone, meaning, sleeping over, all the time we spent together avoiding life, and I was just use to being less, or not important....He had ONE thing, that until today when people try to fuck with him I say, He's the first one, that in Sto. Dgo. Held my hand proudly, and If people stared He (and his NYC attitude) would replay What r you looking at, and coming from an adolescence lacking that granted that made me feel like ddaammmn right bitches...check this shit out.

Anyhow, He’s happily married to Natalie ( funny how he hated how she laughed and u could hear it across la residencia) and im glad, He needed happiness and He found it. :)

Its just weird sometimes how we suffer, pq si, or by being fixed of an idea a very particular idea, If one could detach oneself from feelings, and see it from up above maybe we wouldn’t suffer so much, then again, I see it like this now, because time has passed and thanks to that, I learnt many things, things I did not repeat in my next relationship, and now I’m in the same place, Things I learnt with my new not so new ex, ehhe, I’m repeating the good and trying to break the pattern of the bad.

Talking about patterns.. I guess we all have them, conductas aprendidas, things the we saw at home, parents, and relatives...

I came to realize I have been repeating a pattern, I almost forgot this.... but the other day it came to me, so simple...

Growing up, I with relatives, and when my mother came back to D.R. she had like 3 jobs, I was home alone, most of the time, and then, when I was 17 until my 20's my mom and my aunt-granny they were always traveling, I was alone most of the time, It was lonely, but it was fun, I would dance around the house, talk on the phone like crazy, and read endless comic books to my dogs.

We had exchange students, because I wanted to understand a bit what It felt like to have a siblings, but they would leave and I was alone again, And I would really enjoy it, being my myself, but my dramatic side would feel abandoned...

I did understand that my mom HAD to be absent in order to give me the life, she wanted to give me, summer camps, nice school, English, French, Italian, German classes on Saturdays, and the 2 trips a year we would take to eeuu...

Nevertheless, as soon as I got a taste of having people around, I started to cling, I started to have fear of being alone, and that translated into creating in my young adult life, relationships with friends and boyfriends/girlfriend of.. (And this is very important folks)

1.) Withholding

2.) Withdrawing

3.) Projecting

Basicamente:: keeping inside things I should say, swallowing my anger, secrets and lies, pulling back from contact, not reaching out, feeling lonely while being with someone and and attributing stuff that is going on with me, fears, sadness to other people...

Basically creating co-dependent circles with the people around me...

In addition, god, I am learning now, at 27 that is SO NOT healthy, nor the way to go.

So my question is::

When did this start and how did I not see it??????

I don’t know really how to make or form other type of relationships really, It's what im use to, but at least, I've realized the pattern and hopefully that's part of the healing o don’t know the path to change it.

I remember in my early 20's having a drastic change, well not drastic but if life is like a big window with parts that are dirty or blurred discovering those parts I couldn’t see before, I feel im there again, but this time is somehow different, refreshing, the first time I felt this i was just amazed it was happening, now its more like ok ok ok its happening again, NOW what am I going to do with it?

gosh, Indeed I love to talk (write)..

all this to say I found

faithless evergreen

the lyrics ::

( siempre me gusto that concept of running with rain face ingenioso but very true for those who cry often, way to often ehhehe ahhhhh yes la melancolia inglesa simply kicks ass hurrray for the eternal rain in the north they go deeeeeeeeeeeeep into the uy me duele)

Running with my rain face on
Today I woke up feeling sad
I know that you said,
That one day I would be glad
Hold the Choirs of Winter,

The Birds are calling to me and
All the leaves I came to love are falling
Ribbons on evergreen, owls that pull them apart
I can hear you singing my funny valentine
Oh you know that breaks my heart
Hold the choirs of winter,
The Birds are calling to me and
All the leaves I came to love

Oh you know that breaks my heart
Oh you know that breaks my heart

Running with my rain face on
No Idea of what to say
No idea of what to do
In this fear that never goes
Waiting for all my dreams
Oh you know it breaks my heart
Hold the Choirs of Winter,
The Birds are calling to me and
All the leaves I came to love

Oh you know it breaks my heart
Oh you know it breaks my heart
Oh you know That breaks my heart

And finally a post about randomness:: Hay un lugar en el mundo que el sol le da de frente llamado :: Tuvalu

2009-10-03T00:43:00.014+02:00

cristal blue water

lovely tanned people

weird tropical landscape

En definitiva yo voy al contrario de la rutina, i stay in on weekends.
Encontre algo peculiar, IF i ever get married I would like to honey moon in Tuvalu..
( si no es que gracias al calentamiento global la vaina desaparece)
osea, toy en shock.
Son unas islitas perdidas, y tiene mas o menos la misma cantidad de gente que el vaticno...como asi? y de paso se han hecho de varo vendiendo los domains .tv y graciiias a eso dejaron de ser 3er mundo, por lo menos UN caso en donde el capitalismo funciona.
Pero si alguien me quiere donar, un viaje para alla, yo encantada.
Would'nt it be nice to die in a place like this?

about tuvalu::
http://ipsnoticias.net/nota.asp?idnews=41646
http://www.tuvaluislands.com/
http://www.timelesstuvalu.com/
http://www.who.int/countries/tuv/es/

geen trenen, geen pijn!// screaming this 'till my lungs are sore

2009-09-22T06:19:00.006+02:00

R.I.P. :: alf + ali & co = 2004-2009 ::

I admire people that move on.
I do aswell but it takes me tijd. véél tijd.
And it's not una vaina de poseción, It goes behond that, is the presence....is knowing that there is nothing more to talk about with a certain being, is knowing, that the best that one can do, or give, is silence, because at a certain point, silence becomes pasive way of loving..and when i say loving, i don't mean it in the ¨i-wanna-fuck-you-and-be-with-you¨tipe of loving, just pure and gentle love, of just being glad the other person exist.
It´s an understanding of the fact that it's best not to exist, it's best to delete, and if you ever pop up again, it will be with a clean start, it will be new and with a fresh fruit flavour, not stale and unconfortable.
Your mother was here, she called someone else to say Hi, i still remember you..I did not get a call like that, that proves my theory of not being liked, and at first i felt pain, and anger, but a weird relief of knowing that maybe, she, the person who brought YOU to the world was happy with your new found light...and that made me smile weird feeling... feeling that I thought would last long, but it turned quite quickly into a smile. a pure pristine clear smile.
I smiled. I did.
:)
I dont know if I should be happy or sad that I've learnt this now, or maybe I'm re learning, that I might not be there, I might not know things with details, but I can genuinamente be happy for the joy around you. I can imagen your smile, and the energy you expel and the thought of that makes me smile. I guess that's healthy...And for that progress on my behalf I'm happy.
I'ts funny on how negative I was when I had everything, and now that I feel i have nothing, or less, I'm capable of being more positive. Life works in weird ways sometimes.
I have a recurrent dream about being in a machine,either it's a car, or airplane, or train, or roller coaster that I cant really manage or drive, and I get into trouble, in traffic or handleding the machine and i feel angustia and I guess the machine, is my life, the tools I've been given to ¨make it¨ and me not knowing how to use them, somehow I always survive, yet I feel not trapped but not funtioning to my fullest, maybe i know what this dream means, maybe I dont...somehow i feel these dreams are linked to you..
I'm getting use to the idea that your saying goodbye to me, the saddest part, is lossing indeed my best friend, because you were, and i feel like a huge part of my life has been removed violently.
It's indeed an introspective moment, maybe finally I'm letting the sunshine meet my conciencia.
Maybe, just Maybe, from this my only child ass will learn how to handle true conections, because in this one, I, yes I fucked up, but it's ok, I'm smiling, I'm human, and i shout to the world, i made many mistakes, maybe one day we shall meet again, and we shall look at eachother like we did 6 years ago, and if that happends, I'll give you a high 5, in true dominican sto- dgo meets romana style and it will be the proof that a.) people have several soulmates, b.) true conections don't fade, they just take breaks.
because intensity, or too much intensity burns.
I've learnt. so if you ever read this, thank you.
yes, oh yes, im a nostalgic bitch, specially at 6.49 am.

love is in the air...

2009-09-21T02:49:00.002+02:00

so that's my idiot face when i like someone..
jesus :p pq no me dicen nada?

Season 4 episode 2 :: Stay stunned because when real people fall they get back up. :)

2009-09-20T15:53:00.006+02:00

Long time, no see.
Summer finally went away.
The heat has vanish, endelijk!
What's new..
I've been dating Gabriele, lovely 24 year old Roman, stud muffin' muffiinn' bitter/sweet massive brain muffiiinnn (with a temper but a) heart of gold muffiiinnn....
I wish he would see what I see regarding him, but we shall working on it. Because he's like me, several years ago...
SoI'ts a fact, I'm not miss skinny as I was last summer, then again, my anorexic self got into a lot of trouble, drugs and a pregnancy.
Im human, we all made mistakes, and I made my share of mistakes.
Simon is being shared, he spends 2 weeks with me, 2 weeks with his dad, at first he was very sad, but now, hes dealing with it pretty damn well, he finally saw the advantages of having 2 homes, and loving parents that barely talk to eachother...
update on the past cuz this post is about g a b s ....(With Alfredo, one of the last things i told him was that I was not going to give up, but sometimes not giving up, is letting go, sometimes not giving up is what would be consider giving up...I didn't. .......yet i just came to see, that if I don't mean shit to someone, I don't have to push, It's ok, I don't need no one to reafirm the fact that I am indeed beautiful, I'm smart and I'm not as superfitial as some people may think...the point is, what other people think should not be a concern. We were toxic to eachother, politing ourselfs with this evil love/hate air...)
I realized once again in my life, that I'm worth it, and that I should value myself higher.
Now, Gabriele and myself....
We've been friends for a while, and it was all very sudden and inesperado, fresh, , we r both very different, and we are both use to different things, but when there's a will, and when people respect one another things work...
My approach this time, is not what it use to be..
But it feels nice, to wake up and see his little cute roman eyes, that i never know if their open or closed...
He often calls me beautiful, and under my dark skin I blush.
This time im not making up things to enchant myself, im letting reality, calmness and the truth, yes the truth for me an others be the main thing.
I don't want to lie, and I don't want to feel like i have to hide parts of me, I wanna grow, hand by hand, with Gabs...Learn shit together engage in the fight for life, in a team, with no one butting in, nor my parents nor his, nor the world...Just our own little co-commited bubble, our flexible bubble that is there for one an other but eachone stands by himself, meaning, no co-depending, seeing and sharing happyness unstead of changing my happyness for his, o viceversa...
I feel good. finally. A true smile surge de mis labios.
Lets say I'm picking up my life, it has taken me over a year, yes a year..from the big fall down of November.....
I feel better. granted still things are not organized, i still have to figure out a rutine for myself, but at least im open to it, I'm aware...
Today is Sunday, the thin crispy air of fall enters thru my window, and as I see Montjuic from my window and Barcelona graces me with her beauty I feel like saying Hi to world.
hi.
ok im off to clean a bit.
( yes im still a very messy person )
ehhe
good Sunday you all.

Date one.out of 25 of being alone in the house.

2009-08-02T14:42:00.003+02:00

Trying to break los patrones de conducta.
Asi que ahora me dispongo a no llorar mas.
Y shake it off, organizando y limpiando.
( heheh who would expect that of me? :p no oonneee)
ok, here goes..
my first atempt of being ....
o r g a n i z e d .

to be continued.

lets see if i can pass from being emotional to fucking logical.
messy to neat.

..............................................................................................

2009-06-01T01:11:00.003+02:00

Avey Tare & Kría Brekkan

In the city I wander
worms get smashed under
all those people are busy with things

And here I go crazy
and there I get lazy
like a calf that is growing six legs

My body's slowly
figuring out how
it fits in the moments of missing

Steady in my thoughts
I soften the tight knots
My stomach's alright, though it's twisting

On a beautiful surf
I found a seaweed person
in hot light reflected green on the sand

I was a little uncertain
that some things might hurt me
in the night I hid my eyes with my hand

Then off of the breeze
I heard a sudden burst and
in fright imagined thumps on the land

There is a house on the trees
where all the shadows work and
they don't make their plans your plans

And maybe I'm naive
to say you should just breathe
and float out of pain when it's hissing

'Cause here I sit crying
and she's not here, I am
I can't handle a moment she's missing

Then I eat with my people
and I laugh at the steeples
'cause Hell is my own bad thinking

I know that the rain moves
and enters the dream pools
and diamonds are days with fire

And you help the sneeze
for as long as you could
just to cast it to the sneezing void

I think I have a disease
that makes my hearing imperfect
but at least I make some wonderful noise

And back in the trees
I saw a shadow's birth, but
no one said it's a girl or a boy

You can take all you want
from another person
In the end you find you lose your voice

In the city I wander
worms get smashed under
the streets where all those people are busy

Here I go crazy
but there I feel lazy
like a calf that is growing six legs

My body's slowly
figuring out how
it fits into moments of missing

2009-05-31T19:42:00.001+02:00

ok, oficialmente crying. you were right i cant avoid my culture.

leggie blond.

hello. because i refuse to say goodbye...

2009-05-31T18:12:00.012+02:00

'' The meeting of two personalities

is like the contact of two chemicals substances::

if there is any reaction, both are transformed.''

Many things have been happening and many new things have changed.
i left the story before some drama went down.. things got sorted out.

im still broke but finally i have a house.
but today i will not write about the past...nor the future......

lets talk about now

I feel this sensation of warmth of being touched by a sun beam..sometimes we complicate things, but for a long time, things just didnt seem to flow, things didnt take the natural course and without expecting it..
boom!!!! brightness stares at me right in the face..I must admit, Im hard headed and after making a first contact, i thought of not replying anymore...i dont know why im just like that.
Im glad for the time, and the delightful conversations , the exchange of ideas, im glad for the long walks, for the kisses in the forehead..so many things without making sence made complete sence. you glow kid. you fucking glow.
The funny thing is how u can click with people...without saying much, we shared many things.
ie kisses in the forehead. i love that. always have always will..but i also find myself telling people kiss me in the forehead..
for some reason you knew.
Its very refreshing. Theres a sence of loss but the sence of something bigger was implanted...makes averything soothing.
thank you for your very odd presence in the precise moment....

i needed this hit of light. this boost of energy , you just tickled my soul.
I hope i was able to give you this minty fresh feeling aswell.
im loving it, bittersweet as life is, but at least even if it was short...it happend

and im still shimmering, shivering.
ive cried my little tears, mostly of intense joy....its a sensation of being brought back to life....
Im alive, and Im breathing...and you just made breathing a hell of a lot sweeter.

May Norway find you well and may the universe bless the womb you came out from because you at least for me are a gift.

eternally takk.

2009-03-13T17:46:00.003+01:00

Who am i fooling?

bueennas que tiene la laa laaaaaaa la la lala lalllaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa

2009-03-10T23:18:00.002+01:00

Oye abre tus ojos mira hacia arriba
disfruta las cosas buenas que tiene la vida

ENOUGH OF SADNESS
SPRING IS HERE and its time to bloom.
no more sadness.
no no no no no.
happy thoughts.
changes.
many changes.
Im changing my job ( in 2 weeks) house ( in 3 weeks) hair ( 1 week)
emotional make over
a new landscape to work with.
:)

el ke se acueta con muchacho amanece meao

2009-02-24T20:02:00.002+01:00

so here is the deal my ¨friend¨
when u love, u give a hand, and when u cannot give a hand, your behaviour or act changes among the people you fucked over, to show simplicity, to show this aint no fight, to prove that u are indeed sorry.
but your not. because the way you behave is like you couldnt give a fuck que me esta llevando el mismiso diablo.
again.
with friends like you i fear my enemies..
at least i know what to expect from my enemies...

how could you be so doctor evil?

2009-02-24T12:12:00.007+01:00

Im still dealing with the fact that I dont want to hate you, yet you bring out me a side that I dont know...you bring out hate, and u bring out violence...I've never been this way, so i must control this shit.
Talking talking talkity talk talk.
fuck off.
My room is my room, my space is my space, my shit is my shit.

Se acabo lo que se daba.

Aint no body steeping on me ever again.

this is very delicado.
I think I should tell them peeps im out.

................................................................................................................h e a r t l e s s

2009-02-17T23:18:00.003+01:00

Kanye West - Heartless from universalmusicgroup on Vimeo.

2009-02-17T22:59:00.001+01:00

Im trying ( maybe not hard enough) to put myself in your shoes.
and Still..I dont quite get it..
time will tell what the fuck..no?

so the question is....

2009-02-17T22:58:00.002+01:00

If im the one who got fucked over..
you are mad, apathetic, quiet because?

again...fuck off.

2009-02-17T07:08:00.001+01:00

atropello deliberado porque sí, por quitame esta paja, por comodidad linguistica no LO TOLERO MAS.
delante de mi, quien diga una puta ves mas...sudaka de mierda, se puede morir y de ti, mucho menos.
Going back to sleep.

______________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________

2009-02-16T19:01:00.002+01:00

i thought i would be so mad today...but im not.
:)
im actually relaxed.
thank you.
______________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
______________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
______________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________

______________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________

2009-02-16T09:03:00.003+01:00

ive been up and running since 8am.
son las 0 and i feel like i need sleep.
ya, es la hora 00:00..im an alien.

______________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________

2009-02-15T23:22:00.002+01:00

for the first time i got
f l o w e r s

I become an illegal alien on monday.

2009-02-13T13:13:00.003+01:00

fuck you.

Ok. im still very angry and bitter.

2009-02-13T02:11:00.004+01:00

Primero::

Siempre uno escucha de como el ¨sudaka¨de mierda has to go back, o de como el sudaka te kito el trabajo, o de como la sudaka de mierda te follo y te dejo..
now let me tell you one thing mother fuckers....
YO aqui no le he quitado el trabajo a nadie, ni tampoco he robado, ni he vendido drogas, ni me he prostituido,ni me he brincado la mierda del metro ( que mucho de ustedes hacen), nunca he dado una mala informacion cuando me preguntan lo que sea..
entonces bien..
the shit goes the other way around..
a mi si que me han dicho puta por mi fucking nacionalidad, a mi si que me han mal informado EN TODAS LAS MALDITAS OFICINAS PUBLICAS,me han negado por 4 putos años la seguridad social y el CATSALUT, a mi me han ofredico trabajo de limpieza cuando hablo mas idiomas que el promedio español y tengo mas años de estudio, a mi si que me han hecho esperar 5 meses casi la mitad de un puto año para darme un no timido en plan de ayuda con los papeles..
entonces por donde mierda le entra el agua al coco?
WHOS FUCKING WHO? lets get this shit STARIGHT. whos fucking who mother fuckers?
Tengo una rabia tan grande, que me dan ganas de mandarlo todo a la mismisima mierda.

Segundo::
Al no estar en mi pais, constantemente hago el esfuerzo, de entender, de comprender, de hablar y respetar su lengua, de tragarme las malas miradas y los comentarios de las viejas ordinarias de mierda, de abrir puertas en royo cortesia pq me sale del alma y que no me den las gracias, de pagar cosas cuando no deberia de pagarlas pq gano una mierda y yo no veo que a mi esa vaina se me devuelve.
and my question...
WHY THE FUCK am i taking SO MUCH SHIT?

Tercero::
Yo vengo de un pais latino igual, donde el machismo se aprende en la casa, en la escuela, por suerte, tuve la grandisima suerte, de ser criada entre mujeres, por ende esa mierda, nunca la tuve...
Y si no se limpiar y cocinar, es porque no vine a la tierra a eso, sino instruirme, a viajar, a leer...mal que bien lo hago pero no es my deber pq soy mujer.
and this is supose to be a FIRST WORLD COUNTRY.. y tener a gente que te grite across the room ..TU TE CALLAS, just because your giving your humble opinion.... o estar en un grupo de trabajo y ser la unica mujer y q me digan TU busca el cafe..
O trabajar dando flyers y aguantar que unos imbeciles de mierda me digan que a la gente de Nigeria o que se yo ke pais no le de pq tuvieron problemas con 2 de ese pais y por lo tanto como son negros, y de africa..
MIRA
FUCK THIS SHIT.
WHAT THE FUCK IS WRONG WITH YOU ALL?

THIS IS NOT HUMANE.
THIS IS NOT NORMAL.
THIS IS NOT ACEPTABLE.
ITS NOT and I DONT GIVE A FUCK who says its ok.
ITS NOT.

Si fuera asi entonces todos los españoles son unos ladrones de mierda, pq llegaron a latino america con espejitos y se lo cambiaron a los indigenas por oro..
o peor aun la nueva reconquista, que muchos de ustedes celebran como un puto trofeo de a voy a tu pais monto un hotel y te doy trabajo de limpieza...
y yo no ando diciendo ay ay ay cuidado es español cuidado si te roba.
SO WHAT THE FUCK?
esta maldita senofoia...
and i dont really understand what the fuck with the racial issue..if you all aint white either..
i dont understand shit.

Im LIVID right now, Tengo muuucchhaaa rabia contenida.
Y no le voy a permitir a nadie mas, que me pisotee.
IM FUCKING TIRED OF THIS SHIT.
FUCK IT, and FUCK all those little pathetic ways.

se que no todos son asi..
lo se, pero eso no va a ustedes..los q me cuidan. esto va a los hijos de puuuttaa en extranjeria...esto va a los que me ofrecen trabajo de limpieza, esto va a los q me han agarrado el culo pq si.

como el tipo de telefonica q fue a la casa de paloma y dijo..
Entonces..hmm dominicana...tu eres caliente entonces no?
WHAT THE FUCK DUDE?
what the fuck is this general disrespect.
FUCK you telefonica guy, and FUCK you inmigration lady, AND fuck you ex boss who told me that nigerians where bad cuz uuuuu u had problems with 2 of that country.
FUCK THAT SHIT, and that fucking TINY ASS mentality..
pathetic mentality.
Espero que las proximas generaciones, vengan con otra mentalidad, que sean abiertos que ya no se usen palabras como Negrata ( because to me, that sounds like Nigger ok.?? ) en fin...espero que cambie, no por mi, si por el bien de este pais, pq esta maldita hostilidad nos va a matar a todos de un atake al corazon.

Good night.
I feel much better.
sorry if i ofended anyone loved.
its not my intention.
but this is MY blog. and i need to VENT out some shit.

photobooth

2009-02-12T22:35:00.002+01:00

Trust no one

2009-02-12T14:25:00.003+01:00

Bueno, ya por suerte he parado de llorar como cañeria rota, puedo resolver mi estancia legal por arraigo, en teoria....a ver si es cierto.
Estos temas drenan tanta energia, y es comico ver como la gente aqui que esta del otro lado no se percata de esas vainas.
Yo soy creo fielmente de que todos somos iguales, y que todos nos merecemos los mismos chances, pero esta maldita estructura global en la que vivimos, de dar alas a unos y cortaselas o otros..es una mierda.
Y yo tengo dos opciones...dos...
dejarme caer y regresarme a casa y rendirme y darme por vencida.
o luchar hasta la ultima gotita de sudor, sangre y lagrimas..
Algo positivo es aprender a depender solo en mi, siempre que uno se agarra de alguien, te fallan, la gente es asi.lamentablemente..
Tengo unas ganas de rasurarme la cabeza, enorme.enorme....
this feels like shit pero si de algo no puedo quejar es que mal que bien, tengo amigos, y tengo un techo, y comida....y se que hay gente que ni a eso tiene acceso.
So im trying to be thanfull for what i have and remain positive..
I will let this pass thru me,and learn.
Thats all i can do.
Hoy yo fui la daysleeper, no escuche el despertador, no escuche nada.
me desperte y me di un desayuno de comida chatarra que creo que me ha sentado mal, doritos tex mex, marshmellows, cocacola, cigarrillos.
yumm yumm...
deberia de salir y dar un paseo.
eso de quedarme encerrada en mi room comiendome la cabeza no puede ser.
En unos dias cumplo 27 años.
FUCK.

im thinking it over..anywaaayyyyy yeah yeah yeahh.

2009-02-12T03:24:00.001+01:00

I know what you're doing, I see it all too clear
I only taste the saline when I kiss away your tears
You really had me going, wishing on a star
But the black holes that surround you are heavier by far
I believed in your confusion, you were so completely torn
Well it must have been that yesterday was the day that I was born
There's not much to examine, there's nothing left to hide
You really can't be serious if you have to ask me why
I say goodbye...

'Cause I am barely breathing
And I can't find the air
I don't know who I'm kidding
Imagining you care
And I could stand here waiting
A fool for another day
But I don't suppose it's worth the price, worth the price
the price that I would pay

Everyone keeps asking, what's it all about?
I used to be so certain and I can't figure out
What is this attraction? I only feel the pain
There's nothing left to reason and only you to blame
Will it ever change?

'Cause I am barely breathing
And I can't find the air
I don't know who I'm kidding
Imagining you care
And I could stand here waiting
A fool for another day
But I don't suppose it's worth the price, worth the price
the price that I would pay

But I'm thinking it over anyway, thinking it over anyway

I've come to find, I may never know
Your changing mind, is it friend or foe?

I rise above, or sink below
With every time, you come and go
Please don't come and go

'Cause I am barely breathing
And I can't find the air
I don't know who I'm kidding
Imagining you care
And I could stand here waiting
A fool for another day
But I don't suppose it's worth the price, worth the price
the price that I would pay

Id like to finish this tonight.

2009-02-11T18:35:00.000+01:00

FUCK the whole ZEN thing, im fucking pissed off and hurt.

2009-02-11T06:23:00.004+01:00

Quizas tenemos conceptos diferentes de amistad.
Y si, si estoy molesta, muy..no se si estoy mas molesta que dolida....
OJO no me molesta la desicion porque este es un mundo libre, y cada quien hace lo que quiere/puede...
Pero que clase de amigo hace eso?
que clase de amigo te deja esperando?
Lo que me parece aun mas mesquino es como se le dio largas al asunto y como si fueras TU el herido..o la victima te atreves a decirme que me haga silencio...que no quieres escucharlo mas..y todas las veces anteriores que preguntaba, era como bueno ahora no quiero hablar de eso.
Me parece super jodido...Y eso, my friend..no es un amigo.
Con un amigo al menos se pueden dialogar las cosas, no cambiar la opinion del otro, pero minimo el dialogo es fundamental..
Me siento rotisima..y hasta cierto punto casi como sucia, violada o peor aun desechable.
Sabes te tenia ahi arriba santificao...lo cual es un gravisimo error.
Te complicas un monton la vida..lo sabes?
tienes que aprender a hablar..o la vas a pasar muy mal en la vida.
your not my friend...a friend would never do this.
Tengo un rabia contenida que se me hacen nudos en la garganta.
Que imbecil yo,al pensar que aun algun momento fuiste mi amigo.

______________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________

2009-02-11T01:21:00.004+01:00

Just tell me what you've got to say to me I've been waiting for so long to hear the truth It comes as no surprise at all you see So cut the crap!

2009-02-11T00:17:00.005+01:00

Just tell me

what you've got to say to me
I've been waiting for so long
to hear the truth

It comes as no
surprise at all you see

So cut the crap and tell
me that we're through
Now I know your heart, I know your mind
You don't even know you're bein' unkind
So much for all your highbrow Marxist ways
Just use me up and

then you WALK AWAY

Boy, you CAN'T play me that way

Well I guess what
they say is true
I could never spend my life with
a MAN LIKE YOU

I could never be your woman
I could never be your woman
I could never be your woman
I could never be your woman
I could never be your woman
I could never be your woman
I could never be your woman
I could never be your woman
I could never be your woman
I could never be your woman
I could never be your woman
I could never be your woman
I could never be your woman
I could never be your woman

its time to leave...

2009-02-10T21:37:00.002+01:00

To Build A Home

Out in the garden where we planted the seeds
There is a tree as old as me
Branches were sewn by the color of green
Ground had arose and passed it's knees

By the cracks of the skin I climbed to the top
I climbed the tree to see the world
When the gusts came around to blow me down
I held on as tightly as you held onto me
I held on as tightly as you held onto me......

Cause, I built a home
for you
for me

Until it disappeared
from me
from you

And now, it's time to leave and turn to dust........

All i wanted was to be equal and to have the same rights, my mistake was thinking that you shared that thought too.

2009-02-10T20:55:00.008+01:00

Ho sabia, ho podia veure en els teus ulls, jo l'únic que volia era escoltar-te i no vas tenir els collons de dir-ho. Però t'entenc, saps?
És una mica difícil i complicat, és també una cosa de confiança que t'entenc, t'ho juro, t'entenc, no hi ha sentiments dolents.
Només és un sabor que tinc i he d'aprendre d'això.
Estic més enfadada amb mi, per creure....
per creure que les coses es resolen per art de magia.
Et desitjo el millor, i no estic enfadada amb tu.
Ara l' únic que queda és recollir els trossos que queden de mi...enganxar-los i anarme'n.
Barcelona em va matar...i abans que això passi, trio la meva salut mental..
Im done.
Que encuentres lo que buscas corazón.

Day sleeper.

2009-02-09T14:41:00.004+01:00

Go on, keep on fooling yourself, keep on sleeping your life away, keep on promising and making plans, go on.Keep on leding me on like a fucking idiot.
Sleep it all away. Sllep the joy the pain, the sunny days, the rain, your life...go on..sleep your life away.
This has taught me not to belive in anyone.
Little by little, life in Barça is showing me that you can trust no one...because that will only leed to sadness, and disapointment, y yo paso de sentirme asi, Ill resolve my things, i will...and i will emerge from this.
You just keep on sleeping it all away.

pixels around me :)

2009-02-06T03:04:00.002+01:00

7 feb @ Apolo.

2009-02-02T01:49:00.001+01:00

CORNELIUS from borntofilm on Vimeo.

uyuyuyuyuyuyuyy
couunttinngg the motherfucking dayyyysss
until im jumping and sweaattinngg in front of theseeee bitches
in apolo :D

quiting smoking?

2009-02-02T00:45:00.001+01:00

To all the peeps around me that always say that they will stop smoking YA.

Take it slow..take it easy on me :)

2009-02-02T00:39:00.001+01:00

Perdiendome en un mar de pixeles pastelosos.

2009-02-02T00:23:00.003+01:00

Bueno.
This weekend was aight.
I had fun, i ate pancakes, i helped out friends with a toilet situation...
and most of the time, I woke up with a huge smile.
I was lost in emptyness, tears, drugs and alcohol..now im lost in pixels.
And damn im enjoying this ride...
because finally someone is willing to take it slow and take it easy on me.
Thank you.
Lo ultimo que necesito es q me agobien..y do that myself enough..
Had a lovely time and im entering feb ( full of debt ) but with a Huge smile and a tinkelish feeling that makes me feel warm and alive.
Im slowly going back to smiles...
even if im alone, even if i have a mess, or debt.
Thank you.

Re thinking shit out.

2009-01-30T02:47:00.000+01:00

Animal Collective "My Girls" from Chad von Nau on Vimeo.

One jaded person is enough.

2009-01-30T01:00:00.002+01:00

Ok.
Yo creo el drama a mi alrededor y yo soy la unica dueña de mi bienestar.
Te debo una disculpa, se que puedo ser sofocante.
Im sorry those are not my intentions pero anyway yeah now i feel bad, pq jodi y jodi tanto que now u feel broken. that was not the point.
at all.
Im sorry.

Im beginning again.

2009-01-29T22:05:00.005+01:00

For the first time in 3 months i said yes.
cuando uno decide que ya fue, es que fue.
y estoy ahi..
empiezo a sentirme mas ligera...calmada.
aceptar es el 1er paso a superar...
hoy me siento trankila.
ill make it...
:)
miel y aloa sobre las heridas..its time to heal :)

Oficialmente...Im done.

2009-01-20T19:09:00.003+01:00

Im done..im done with the crying, im done with feeling helpless, im done with feeling like i deserve this, im done feeling like im crap, im done feeling like its the end of the world, im done with being closed to other people, im done with taking you sleeping with girls in your room, im done with the ideas that once i had of us, im done with my crying, im done with my insomnio, im done. im so done. im not over you. but done feeling like crap. i deserve better, you made this desition so i will finally take the step.
i dont want you in my life at least not now...i cant. its taking too much space and energy and i come first. i have to come first. i have to love me more than you.
im not made out of plastic, no soy desechable.im done.
cest fini.

and this is going to be me.

la cancion que hizo llorar a simon hace 730 dias aprox. hoy me hace retorserme a mi.

2009-01-20T15:34:00.003+01:00

So broken,
In pieces,
My heart is so broken,
I'm puzzling.

Here I go
Trying to run ahead of that,
Heart break train,
Thinking,
It will never catch up with me.

I'm so broken,
heðan-biður-afte-care,
So broken,
heðan-biður-afte-care,
Yeah, ha-ee, ha-ee, ha-mmm,
heðan-biður,
** Icelandic part **
Wooh-ahhh-hmm...

I'm trying to land,
This aeroplane of ours gracefully,
But it seems just destined to crash,

I'm so broken,
heðan-biður-afte-care,
My heart is so broken,
heðan-biður-afte-care,
Yeah, ha-ee, ha-ee, ha-mmm,
** Icelandic part **

How can, how can,
And I sense
All continuity
Has vanished away
At one step at a time now baby, baby
I'm so broken
heðan-liður-afte-care
I'm-m-m-mmm...so broken
heðan-biður-afte-care
Yeah, ha-ee, ha-ee, ha-mmm
** Icelandic part **

I'm so...
Completely unhealable, baby
Ohhh!!
Ohh-er-him

Thats why right next to your bed esta la botellita roja.

2009-01-20T03:58:00.009+01:00

Cuando uno piensa que de repente se paro del suelo, y que mas o menos logra caminar nuevamente en dos piernas, y recto, viene una patada al estomago...
Lamento que no entiendas, y lamento no entender.
lost in translation.
No busco razones para bajarme, pero no soy como tu, yo pregunto, para enterarme y saber, para clavarme el puñal yo solita, y aunque tarde en sacarlo, pos ahi esta y eventualmente lo sacare.
Han pasado dos meses.
Quisiera que el tiempo pasara mas rapido.quisiera tener un nuevo set de problemas y no estos, quisiera no sentir nada, que no me importara nada, y quisiera ser un ser de luz iluminado constantemente por una luz propia cegadora, pero no soy asi.
Ojala mi percepcion de las cosas cambiaran, ojala no fuera tan piscis yo.
Ojala el miedo no me tragase cada noche, y ojala no me ahogara entre lagrimas y saliva espesa..pero no soy asi.
Al final ninguno de los dos tiene la razon, pq yo no soy tan dramatica y tu no eres tan frio...
I wish you could see other parts of me...pero u dont care tampoco.
si me quisieras conocer leyeras esto...pero no lo haces..
tu tambien estas predispuesto a mi supuesto melodrama...y yo estoy predispuesta a su frio asqueroso.
No puedo mas...no puedo mas.
Tu casa, una vez mi casa la siento ajena, no es mia, es mas, se ha puesto en mi contra, es tu complice, las pareces sudan cosas que yo no logro entender, y no siento que sea mi lugar estar ahi.
I thought i was feeling better.
you r not my salvador, and you cant help me nor will you.
Im alone, and i should embrace that.
I always come to the same conclucion ..i cant see you..smell you, touch you.
not yet.
im getting burnt, eacht time.
No te hago demandas, solo que no entiendo como casi vomito cuando peliamos y tu te quedas igual, casi como imparcial, despegado de la realidad del momento, con una calma asquerosa que me rompe en pedazos.

i will be fine.

2009-01-07T01:26:00.003+01:00

the sun will shine again.
this i know for a fact.
problems will go thru me, and they shall pass, y al final, quedara una alida mas fuerte.
this i know...
and i might cry now, but i will smile in a bit.
i know.

Hungry for a miracle // Empty

2009-01-06T00:48:00.001+01:00

Once again, drama.
I love drama, I create around me.
I’m addicted to sadness like a true junkie.
What is it about this mood that I like?
That it allows me to remain a lazy ass bitch?
Now, am I That lazy?
Have I believe everything ive been told as if it was true?
I have my shitty parts, and I have my daily rage and incoherence, yet I can say today, cleaning the tears from my eyes, that im more human than ever, and more vulnerable than ever…and if anyone has a problem with that, is not my fucking problem.
I will fucking emerge from this one, we will all rise from this one.
I know you will too Alfredo, and you’ll realize that your decision was correct, that you don’t need me in the way.
You miss me now, because its normal to miss each other, because its been 5 years of sharing e v e r y t h I n g.
You are not alone, we are going thru hell and back, and its fine, and it’s a natural process of healing.
We will survive this, I don’t believe love dies, love never dies, but it transforms into new kind of love…
You’ll see.
I love you too.

...

2008-12-25T20:49:00.001+01:00

I know your not ready to live
Are you ready to die
Under your skin under your skin under skin
Is a regular guy

You lost your hold
You didn't know
This is a low

Everything that was important to me
Didn't matter to you
And you didn't try didn't try to get in bed with me
When I turn my back you were with someone new

You lost your soul
You didn't know
This is a low, this is a low

This is low this is low life
A world where people walk by night
So by day an average man
But night time brings the creature from the can
Sometimes you scream out loud
But there's always safety from the crowd
You're not alone you're not alone you know

This is a low, this is a low, this is a lonely time a lonely time

Its like my skin, turned inside out
And there's no silver here in this cloud
It's like a love that's turning sour
Its letting go
This is a low

Im dead skin walking.

2008-12-25T18:00:00.006+01:00

Me rehuso a permitirle a nadie to judge me.
I judge myself enough, and its hard for me to forgive myself...
so fuck you all, with your fucking opions.
with that said, i am finally seeing 3 things::

1. i was the one worth leaving.
2.who are my real friends.
3.i need drastic change.

in the meantime..
im still hurting..and im a zombie walking around bursting into tears.

thom yorke i love thee

2008-12-22T16:44:00.001+01:00

When I'm at the pearly gates
This'll be on my videotape
My videotape
My videotape

Mephistopheles is just beneath
And he's reaching up to grab me

This is one for the good days
And I have it all here in
Red, blue, green
Red, blue, green

You are my centre when I spin away
Out of control on videotape
On videotape
On videotape
On videotape

This is my way of saying goodbye
Because I can't do it fact to face
So I'm talking to you before
No matter what happens now
I won't be afraid
Because I know
Today has been the most perfect day I have ever seen

I love you but enough is enough, y ya esta.

2008-12-22T02:06:00.002+01:00

Moody, sad and feeling like a fucking idiot.

“I’m not living im just killing time”
Radiohead

The shit that I get myself into.
Here I am, floating again in this bullshit feeling of everything/nothing.
I’m blasting down the stairways of a high building holding my chest open while y rub my heart with sand paper waiting for to hit the ground and wake up.
I don’t know how this has been going on but im on this fast track to nothing, I lost my horizon a long time ago, and I thought I never had it far from me, I thought it was reachable, but the more that time passes and the more that ignore my solitude and my void it becomes bigger, so big and powerful that little by little is taking away every last breath and hope that exist me.
I have fucked up ideas of love and family, somehow I expected that to go away with the years, it has not been like that, my disbelief in love just keeps on growing, so how do I go back to that person that believed so much is so many wonderful things, how do I go back to that magical bubble of my teens?
I’m becoming slowly but firmly a stone, a cold emotionless thing.
I’m hurting from the inside out and I don’t know how to cope with it.
I need some sort of light, and output un fucking enchufe with myself, algo que derepente haga click y im back…im back from the dead.
I feel like vomiting all the time, I need to fix myself because no one will. No one will. If I don’t extend a hand to myself, no one will pick me up from the dirt.
. I always let people in, and maybe I let the wrong people in, and the people that knock and knock I leave them outside
My parents have no idea in the shit whole that im in, im in deep deep.
Y para concluir im a fucking idiot.
With that in evidence I rest my fucking case.
I see no way out of my own self, I see no way out.
I hope this year brings me that, light, I need light a bright one to guide me out of this hole, I need guidance.

Quotes para Alfredo hoy dia 26::

2008-11-26T02:36:00.002+01:00

Quotes to help us::

I can't change the direction of the wind. But I can adjust my sails.

Courage is not the absence of fear, but rather the judgment that something else is more important than fear.

Every trial endured and weathered in the right spirit makes a soul nobler and stronger than it was before.

Courage doesn't always roar. Sometimes courage is the little voice at the end of the day that says I'll try again tomorrow.

One's best success comes after their greatest disappointments.

je suis mort

2008-11-26T02:27:00.003+01:00

algo aqui dentro se quebro y murio.
siempre uno quiere dar una onda o on vibe de uno mismo, uno quiere mirarse al espejo y ver el puto reflejo de quien uno cree ser pero no de quien uno realmente es.
i feel dead.nothingness is all over me, and i cant do anything to wash this shit off.
time, time will allow me to see this and learn.
fear and pain will walk thru me, and at the end of the day, ill survive...i know i will.
im learning, im learning.
Ive been crying for 9 days, im dry.
Ive been knocking on your door and i will keep on knocking.
i cant see you, nor speak to you.
i need time too.
i need to die and be re born again.
and i will fadeaway, like all your friends, i will become another one in that file of i loved her so much i wonder how is she doing right now....
and its a fucking pitty..
but its alright...this is called karma.
and here is my concecuencia so now..
suck it up alida..suck it up.
im off to bed.

there has never been anything false about hope...

2008-11-08T11:00:00.002+01:00

entonces, gano obama.
no se que signifique para el mundo, a mi igual los presidentes me parecen puppets..
pero como ende bi racial...como ser humano que no cree en las razas ni naciones por mas cursi que suene..
yes we can.
estados unidos no es mi pais, pero me ha tocado el alma, que alguien como yo, una persona bi racial que una persona como yo, confundida entre el blanco y el negro, un oreo cookie, una persona que se ha movido entre tantos lugares, una persona que entiende o eso creo....que entiende, que al final si nos rajan en el centro del corazon somos la misma mierda...
y aunque sea una propaganda absurda, aunque sea un puppet mas, gracias por esas palabras de esperanzas...gracias por traer ideas que yo siempre he tenido claras que siempre asumi que todo el mundo tenia claras han sido expuestas a gente que nisiquiera lo consideraba.
gracias.
no quiero poner a este personaje como el next jesus cristo o che guevara, pero....
gracias por esas palabras.
gracias..aunque el mundo se vaya a la mierda mañana...
gracias.

no title.

2008-10-23T09:02:00.003+02:00

ok, yes honesty first, i am drunk... among other things...
ok first idea::
people give you clues when they talk, simple, but i had never thought of that, is like clues, and it all depend of how sharp you are as an investigator to figure them out...yes to figure people out, to make belive that u can understand the human mind to the point that u can decipher as if people where some sort of pattern, a sky full of stars and u have to find the geometric shape and take note and make a shape..
Maybbbee just maybe thats called having prejuicios...pero its not like that with me i just listen...and i listen and then i make for myself a visual map.
Its like strings ( cuerdas de una guitarra), with visual images, and then the final image i look from afar..glance at it, and analize it as a painting, the structure, the composition, the colors, the tension of the cords...and then i tell myself..YIKES...you are fucked, or you are blessed, or u are beautiful.
Tonight was a lousy night.
I mean im drunk writting in my blog...
That must ring a bell.then again...i am not a constant person..yet again i am the type that forget but doesnt really forget, and I remember , more or less, come back to it, and boooooom in my face, ahhh im breathing again, and i remember que se siente vivir.
hmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm
Uy uy Uy uy uy uy me fui lejitos.
whatever si al final, esto es un cyber recuerdo personal...y me escribo a mi.
y nadie mas.
un diario frio personal donde no veo la emocion de mi typo.
ay ya....whatever.

i dont have a home, and im tired of feeling so lonely.

2008-10-17T18:25:00.003+02:00

today i was told i do not have a house.
me dolio eso.
segunda vez y dolio.
La 1ra fue Felipe en una discuccion que tuvimos por Joan y por mi actitud en la casa, me grito, this is my house not yours, my mom paid for it.
y en realidad, no creo que fue la mejor manera, pero it was true.
y hoy discutiendo con alfredo me recalca tambien que i do not have a house, i rent a room and this is mettes house, not my house.
no se pq duele pero duele.
quizas pq soy ultra sensible.
y es cierto, theres no place like home, en mi casa en sto dgo es el unico lugar que me siento comoda, pq es mi casa, bueno no es mi casa es de mi madre pero logro relajarme.
todo tiene su precio.
and maybe its true, yo lo que soy es una jodida arrimada.
ay dio, yo necesito terapia...un psicologo no me vendria mal.
no se pq discuciones pequeñas me bajan tanto.
me sigo sintiendo desprotejida, como sin shelter.
se que tengo que aprender a coñazos que YO soy my one and only shelter...
pero no se como enseñarme esa mierda, no se como decirle a mi cerebro constantemente solo quiere buscar refugio que deje de ser tan pendejo y que resuelva y que asuma sus mierdas.
bueno pero ya, tampoco hay q llorar por todo.
all i wanted to say is...
i am ofended.
i do have a house.
i do have my space.

lo entiendo, and its ok....ill be here...take your time..im in no rush. (lay your head where my heart use to be)

2008-09-12T17:22:00.003+02:00

pues, entonces, bienvenido sea el frio, hoy sopla un viento nuevo, ayer hizo un calor agobiante, luego en la noche llovio y pum ya friito.
Hoy robaron en mi trabajo, forzaron la puerta y tuve que ir a ver, dure una hora y algo ahi trancada con un miedo espantozo, miedo a que estaba sola ahi en la oficinita, miedo de que asumieran que yo tenia algo q ver con eso,miedo a los gritos de mi boss por el phone, en fin miedo.
al final, todo bien, lo resolvi, robaron las compus, y ya.
recien llego a casa para encontrar una habitacion asquerosa y desorganizada a un extremo que da miedo, como siempre, no se organizar y punto.
ya ese angelito no me agarra de la mano.y tendre que suck it up, y aprender de una puta vez ser lo que tanto miedo me da ser:: adulta.

humans are dead.....binary soolloooo!

2008-08-10T15:22:00.002+02:00

....

2008-08-06T22:11:00.001+02:00

Lyrics Monaco - What Do You Want From Me? lyrics

we should aalllll sing alonngg!

blank title.

2008-07-26T20:24:00.003+02:00

Recien llego a casa y en la esquina hay una banda,que no suena mal, aunque solo hacen covers, y el tipo no canta muy bien.
great? huh?
hmm
tengo mucho sin decir nada.
lo se.
y como que hoy tampoco es el dia con esa musica ahi fuera..
hay que salir denuevo, y hiur del chirrin chirrin.

Vice es una puta mierda!

2008-07-04T12:36:00.003+02:00

a ver, solo unas lineas para dejar claro que ningun ser humano es un maltido plastic cup, no soy una pedacito de papel, ni basura para ser desechable.
estas mierdas pasan cuando la gente no tiene organizacion, hace planes, llama gente, y luego no la necesitan...
muy mal, muyyy mal. mala onda, mal mal mal mal.
yo lo que no entiendo es como pude ser tan estupida y caer en esa mierda.
im having a horrible week..
only good thing, es que me parecio ver un angel con una sonriza hermosa esta semana..
fuera de eso...todo es una bosta.

Lets DANCE! our LAST DANCE!!!!!!!!!!!!

2008-06-09T21:20:00.003+02:00

reiterrrrooo

HEEEEEEEEEEEEMMMMMMM AAAAAAACCCAAABBBBAAAAAATTTTT!!!!!!!!

fins aviat tothom aquest divendres,queeee feeeeemm????

Hem acabat la escoolllaa!!!!!

2008-06-09T21:04:00.002+02:00

finalment puc dir, see aaccaaabboooo!
hasta ahora, hasta nuevo aviso no me he kemao en nada!
bueno en sistemas pero eso se sabia.
pero na, asi que oficialmenteeeeee el veranito entra, bueno pero eso significa que hay q ponerse las pilas y buscar

jo tambe soc huma

2008-05-24T16:19:00.002+02:00

Hoy nuevamente me siento impontente y triste, aveces por momentos olvido mi condicion de inmigrante, aveces olvido que legalmente hay una diferencia contundente entre mi y otros.
A diferencia de lo que cree mucha gente aqui, yo no quiero que me regalen nada, ni quiero pedir el paro porque si, ni quiero llegar al trabajo para ¨ir a desayunar¨y entrar realmente a las 10 de la mañana, yo lo unico que quiero es igualdad, el derecho y la posibilidad de ganarme la vida como cualquier otra persona, yo lo unico que pido es un maldito chance, yo quiero sentirme digna, quiero tener el mismo derecho que cualquier otra persona que sea de aqui o no, porque me lo merezco.

Francamente estoy harta del tema, y estoy harta de que la gente piense que uno viene aqui a robarle el trabajo a otro, a ver vamos a analizar un poquito...quien tiene la culpa de que alguien español se quede sin empleo? yo la inmigrante? o la frabrica que decidio cerrar aqui para abrir la fabrica en un pais 3er mundista y asi pagar menos, y explotar con mas facilidad a los trabajadores?
Hay muchos que no se declaran racistas pero el comentario de un profesor de la LLOTJA que por suerte no lo dijo delante de mi, pq hubiese reaccionado MUY mal...eso de que traemos enfermedades, por que no mejor cuestionar que tan bueno o que tan malo es el sistema de salud?
son tantas las cosas y aveces me pregunto si la gente se detiene a pensar que uno es igual de fragil, que uno siente y que uno tambien llora.
lo que mas rabia da es darse cuenta q vean a uno como una basurita y que te traten como tal, cuando fui a pedir informacion para lo del seguro social basicamente me dijeron que yo lo que tenia que hacer era regresarme a mi pais..( entre otras obsenidades que no hay que repetir)
Yo lo que quiero saber es una cosa, porque carajo hemos desaprendido tanto?
se nos olvida que desde el principio el humano se ha mantenido moviendose, y que cuando la mierda esta jodida en europa todos salian corriendo, a ver, con lo de franco muchooossssss terminaron en latinoamerica, y no estoy diciendo ojo por ojo diente por diente, pero no entiendo como una historia tan fresca algo que paso literalmente ayer, se nos olvida con tanta facilidad..
me estoy quejando aunque se que yo se las inmigrantes privilegiadas, de las que vino aqui en avion y a estudiar, de las que puede pedir ayuda monetaria a sus padres, de las que habla varios idiomas, de las que ha vivido y ha estudiado fuera de su pais desde hace 5 años....pero mierda por donde carajo le entra el agua al coco?
es dificil, saben? es dificil que te todos los dias o bueno cuando voy a aplicar a un trabajo lo unico que se me recuerde es q ue no soy de aqui por ende im fucked.
no se que mas decir, quiero decir tanto y no se que mas decir, me ahogo en mi propia rabia, y juro que no odio nadie, ni al que me diga q pq soy dominicana soy puta, mas que otra cosa, duele, y no solo por mi, sino tambien por quien diga esas vainas sin deterse a pensar solo por un segundo que antes de ser dominicana, mujer, biracial, clase media, ilustradora, soñadora, pensadora, dramatica, hija unica..antes de ser ttoooooodddoooooooo eso, soy humana...

favorite flavour.

2008-04-05T04:17:00.003+02:00

hace tiempo queno escribo, creo que siempre empiezo los posts asi.
da igual, bueno, realmente he evitado escribir por mucho tiempo, generalmente cuando escribo lo que sea, es como una llamada directa a mi, y imagino que no soy la unica, pero derepente hay veces que uno mismo es too much, y no necesita un descancito de los dialogos internos y el constante cuestionamiento y auto analisis..
pero como siempre poc a poc, regreso a ello, aveces es como si me usara de experimento para entender lo que es la condicion de ser y ser humano.
hay muchas cosas cocinandoce aqui dentro, algunas buenas otras malas, pero todo mio.
he sido irresponsable ultimamente, conmigo, con algunas de mis convicciones y con los demas.
bueno, cest ca, uno aprende a conazos, o bueno por lo menos yo.
de diciembre aca, bueno luego de la rabieta que hice en febrero con mi cumpleaños, muchas cosas han pasado, solo dos meses, pero aqui dentro ha pasado algo.
Siento como si me rindiera antela escuela,i give up, estoy harta, de mi medriocridad pero tambien de los demas.
no me siento movida por ninguna clase, conio como extrano ir a clases transnochada y sensible al mundo, como extranio entregar una tarea y me leyeran hasta los pensamientos escondidos, como extrano esa auto busqueda extensa...
siento como si la llotja fuera una escuela pre empaquetada, o quizas soy yo, quizas soy yo la que no da el todo, quizas yo me he mantenido alejada, eso tambien puede ser, da igual, whatever it is, me siento saturada y quemada...
quisiera invertir mi tiempo en mis cositas y mi paranoia, volverme a sumegir en mi mundo nube burbuja y hacer dibujitos de 5 minutos, o de meses, pero mios....francamente es evidente que estoy harta de la escuela,me pesa, me pesa un monton ir a la fucking clase de dibujo tecnico, y me cuesta fol, que nisiquiera se que carajo significa fol, me divierto mucho en historia, begona es una vercion dominicana pero doblada con acento español,aahh tengo ñ en este teclado..sorry. no pretendo corregir nada, ni por acentos ni poner las eñes que no puse antes...
si hasta eso me cuesta.
bueno pero tranquilloos, no estoy onda suicida, ni triste, sino mas bien quiero un cambio, que la macro vision de la vida vuelva a cambiar y redescubrir todo por 1ra vez, que nuevamente el sonido de las ambulancias me sorprendan como si tuviera 4 años, he tenido varios finales y muchos inicios en mi vida, y quiero un inicio, toy saliendo del capazon y dejando restos de piel atras, y se siente bien, da miedo, muchisiiiiiiiimo, pero se siente bien, descubrir solito que uno puede con las vainas solito, da miedo, pero siente muy bien.
Me rio cuando pienso que la 1ra preocupacion que tuve, antes de ir a Belgica, con 18 años, era con quien dormiria en caso de tener una pesadilla horrible...hehe. tengo 26 pero realmente siento como si derepente empezara mis 20s, como si el tema adultez empieza a tener otro sentido, y se convierte parte de mi....otra cosa que he entendido, es que ser adulto no significa nada, hace mucho que soy adulta biologicamente y recien empiezo a entender como funciona el mundo que me rodea, no del todo, pero ahi vamos, y lo comico es que de pequeña mi frase favoria hacia mi madre era,pero tu eres una adulta, resuelvelo, como si acaso al cumplir los 20 a uno le tocaran el cerebro con una varita magica, con un chip enorme de conocimiento, la edad no da conocimientos, la vida y los tropezones, y avvveeecceeess las alegrias te dan esos conocimientos, es como si casi casi en mi cabecita yo pensaba que al nacer no buscaban bien en el vientre pq se seguro seguro( segun mis calculos y afirmaciones con 8 años) era que habia un libro de instrucciones ahi dentro.
PERO NO.
me he hartaoooooode buscar ese libro y no aparece.
señores, im fine, im alive, im breathing.
good night.

tinc vint-i-sis anys

2008-02-28T21:30:00.003+01:00

uuuuuuuuuuuu im haaapppyy la gente me ha llamao mil gracias!:)

its my fucking bday buju

2008-02-27T23:48:00.002+01:00

So its almost my bday and i aint feeling shit, feel the same way i dont feel 26 nor 25.
im in this limbo quest right now, im probably always in that state, dunno, everything seems shitty right now.
im fine, nothing wrong, but, wheres my cake, my clown, the big birday bash, people rushing to greet me.
ah fuck it, im a bitter bitch, indeed i am.
its been cold the whole fucking day, foggy and humid.
simon sleeps on top of my bed, while i write, i have nothing positive to say, im not mad, its just this constant blah mode, i dont seem to shake this shit off me...
but im not sad, no need to worry, its just like...a void, no, not a void, its the fucking cold.
i cant take this shit any longer.
the fucking cold is getting to me.
i need to see the sun, now, fast quick, prendan el cielo siusplau!
na, thats that, in 4 years im 30.
whoho...not.
ok, im off, 10 min for my bday, voy al techo to see if i see una estrella fugaz o algo, some sort of sign...
someetthing.
adio

Y finalmente algo me hizo sonreir.

2008-01-07T01:17:00.000+01:00

Xmas is gone, its not so cold anymore, por lo menos despues de madrid no siento frio.
Me mude, finalmente...Omar se fue y todo vuelve a la normalidad.
5 more months de escuela. y cest fini.
finalmente!
luego posteare algo.
hoy no.

Anuncios q nunca vi en rep.dom. pero que me han hecho reirme el MASO!

2007-12-09T03:34:00.000+01:00

Un chino bachatero::

Chinito del flow! hahaha q rriiisaaaa

Cubano::

Brazo de Gitano::

Cuando yo era chamakita ::

2007-12-09T01:47:00.000+01:00

Candy::

Carrusel::

Señorita Maestra::

El abuelo y yo::

Odisea Burbuja::

Kids incorporated::

Jem::

yes, i like to kling, i am miss klingy.

2007-12-08T21:55:00.000+01:00

Me gusta escribir cartas, y armar drama por nada y todo, no se porque lo hago, pero es como soy, empiezo a ver todo como por un filtro azulado y se me sube todo toooddoo a la cabeza, hago unos atakes internos de histeria prologando y luego i let people peek que vean un poquito de lo q pasa aqui dentro, generalmente la gente se asusta, pq, realmente no soy nada racional, el pensamiento racional en mi cerebro es una vaina que aun no he experimentado, tengo una inteligencia emocional, lo cual la mayoria del tiempo termina jodiendome.
entonces, cool, im needy, with friends, with family with everything.
Sobre las cartas, a ver, me gusta escribirlas, pero me alimenta muchisimo tambien que me escriban a mi.
las vainas no pueden ser solo de un solo lado..no?
bah no se im blabling, like always...
El gotico esta llenisimo de gente q van con sus fundotas de las compras navideñas..
yo deberia de estar haciendo el fucking pulpo y las demas tareas..
pero no estoy en eso.
siempre hay algo que logra distraerme y sacarme de lo q debo hacer...o quizas yo me voy en esa y sencillamente soy una vaga.
no se, im cold,bored, and pissed off with myself.
Anoche,algo extraño, cenamos con Mormones, fue muy diferente a lo que me esperaba, siempre me ha dado curiosidad, no, no pretendo convertirme, pero yo francamente tenia muchos tabues sobre esa religion.
Cada quien toma la religion que crea conveniente, pero lo q no entiendo es eso de que jesus resusito y fue a las americas a predicar....no se... bueno a mi las religiones no me convencen mucho, pero si creo q de todas algo se puede aprender.
me regalaron el mormon book, lo cual fue lindo...y lo leere como he leido la biblia..pero...
no se, not my thing.
La luz en la hab. de la oficinita es tenue, y esa vaina me re jode la existencia porque es como si tuviera los ojos entre abiertos .....
hmm.
ok, im off, to smoke a pack of cigarrillos, and stare at a wall.

Dia gris:: hermosisimo

2007-12-07T17:40:00.000+01:00

Hoy ha hecho un pokito mas de frio, pero parece q me estoy acostumbrando porque no me ha molestado para nada..
sali con simon y dimos una camita llaarrggaa ..
estamos en finde largo, en teoria se supone que este haciendo tareas a muerte, pero estoy aqui pegada de esta vaina buscando informacion, ilustradores etc.
escuchando a doña tujiko que simply kicks asss.
mi casa nuevamente esta llena de hombres, y no me molesta.
coño men pero es q a mi me molestaba tooddo antes.
i need to chill the fuck down a bit.
:p
na, toy blabling.
pero el dia ha sido super lindo, grriis, y toodos los colores se ven bien, y no saturados por el sol.
adeu.